The Bus Pulls In

One of the Drawbacks of Being a Hillbilly

Is other hillbillies.  I keep hearing people talk about how this cold snap is proof that climate change is a myth. 

Really, y'all?  These are the same people who believe in Creationism, so I don’t know why I’m surprised.

I rant a lot about how a few Southerners make the rest of us look bad by perpetuating the idea that a Southern accent is a mark of ignorance (PLEASE watch The Cult of Dusty’s video about Toby Keith:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rgEtZqstAOA&feature=c4-overview&list=UUtlfyd1Xs9CtxfBNP9_IgAw  - Dusty gets it.). 

Sometimes I don’t blame those who think of us in that way.  This keeps coming up over and over again lately. The bullshit with that dumbass Duck Dynasty show, folks considering the fact that a climate change research team got their ship stuck in polar ice is some kind of irony, and the everyday insults to our culture perpetrated by idiots just keep supporting the sterotype.  The only thing any of us can do is prove them wrong, I suppose. 

But in the meantime, I ask that y'all who don’t live in my little pocket of the country don’t judge us by what you see on television and in media.  We’re not all dumbasses, I promise.

Wish I was at home snoozing

After a hard burn to and from Blairsville (about three hours from ROMEGA) with rain bombarding us the entire way there and back, John and I made it in time for his work’s Christmas party where we took great advantage of an open bar. 

And now I am sitting here at work listening to Isbell (because Isbell ALWAYS) and anticipating the arrival of the tablet I ordered the day after Thanksgiving (my gift to myself) so I can go home after work and not the leave the couch or the house until tomorrow afternoon when we travel the thirty minutes to John’s family’s Christmas shin-dig, where we will be chilling out and eating chicken and dumplings, getting hammered, and playing Trivial Pursuit.

Our new holiday greeting (keeping my man’s Atheism in mind) is “Tolerable Fuckumas.”

So a very tolerable Fuckumas to you all.

What’s Up, Tumblrs?

I’ve neglected Tumblr for a time.  Not on purpose or for any good reason.  Just been busy and am no longer working for the attorney whose torture I endured for way too long.  So I don’t spend all day at work goofing off out of spite anymore. 

I dig my new job.  I work for a company that makes countertops.  I have my own office now and I can listen to Helmet and Sun Kil Moon without troubling the natives.  And joy of all joys, I DON’T HAVE TO ANSWER THE FUCKING PHONE!!

This is the first day in a while that I have run out of things to do.  There are still a few things, but they won’t take me the entire hour I have left.  Oh yeah, did I mention I get off at four?  And I get off at noon on Fridays.  That’s pretty awesome.  Perfect for me in this transitional time of writing more and having more to do with my free time. 

John produces a little concert series that’s on hold at the moment, but we have a big show coming up in January that we need to start pimping after Christmas.  I’ve been reading some of my poetry at these, and we always have my poet friend come and read too.  Speaking of CCB3, he’s trying to get a magazine/website off the ground and he wants me to be a regular contributor, so I need to practice my nonfiction and work on some poems.  Hopefully will get around to writing all those blog posts I keep getting ideas for, which will be good practice.  I don’t know, though, I might want to save some of those ideas for articles. 

Christmas is soon and that’s pretty awesome.  My family does Christmas the week before these days, and unfortunately, John has to work ALL DAY Saturday and we’ll only have part of Sunday to spend with my set, which sucks all that much more now that they live up in the mountains two hours away.  Alas.  But we will have drunken Trivial Pursuit Christmas at John’s family’s yearly event, which was a great deal of fun last year. 

Hope all my Tumblr buddies are doing well.  I’ve missed y'all.  Hoping to be about a bit more regularly.

What doesn’t kill us…

… may drive us crazy, but will hopefully make us stronger. 

In the past week:

-  My man lost his job

-  his truck got stuck in a neighbor’s yard

-  the lawnmower refused to work

-  I got rained on inside my car because my power window motor died when the window was down. 

-  I see no way to change the oil, fix the power window, side view mirror, fuel injectors, and O2 sensor on my car anytime soon. 

-  We may be kicked out of our house or have to do without power, hot water, or water.  Maybe all of the above.  If something doesn’t happen soon on the job front, I don’t know what we’ll do.

-  I had to learn the hard way about how to handle a loved one with acute depression - worse than I’ve ever experienced before

-  I had to learn how to be the strong one

-  I haven’t been able to write in months.  I beginning to worry that I’ve lost my gift.  I hope it’s just the result of of this money stress and will come back when that improves.  Writer friends keep telling me to use it, but I can’t concentrate long enough to try.  Too much fuzz and static in my head.  So I’m reading a lot in hopes it will keep until I’m ready for it.

I’m stuck in between belief systems right now.  I’m bordering on agnostic, one Bible reading away from Atheism, and still not sure if there’s any intellect behind the concept of energy.  I believe energy exists, but I’m not sure if it really does much.  Maybe so.  I know I put a shitload of “it’s going to be okay” energy into J the other night, and he was doing much better the next day.  So I suppose there’s still something to it.  But there’s been nothing but good energy before all this fit hit the shan.  So why this sudden influx of bad?  What did we do wrong?  Did we do anything wrong at all or is it all just dumb luck?

I’ve been trying to avoid the spiritual side of things for fear of driving myself crazy.  But I want to do something about all this.  And job hunting and positive thinking don’t seem to be doing the trick.  Every time I feel like things are about to get better, they get worse.  So I guess I just want to feel like I have some semblance of control over it all.  Control is an illusion, though.  But giving in to that fact is scary. 

Anyway, good thoughts and prayers or vibes, etc. would be greatly appreciated.  I don’t know how much longer I can stay strong in the face of all this. 

Not to Mention

Our yard is awesome.  Roses in the front smelling amazing, roses we didn’t know we had in the back.  And more roses we didn’t know we had at one corner of the house.  They’re gorgeous along with all the honeysuckle and the hydrangeas we just planted.  And the tomato plants in the bed we weeded a couple weeks ago.   Neither John nor I have really gotten into yard work before, but now we really enjoy it and look forward to watching everything evolve as we do more work on the garden and house.

Inventory

Still haven’t found a better job, but:

-  Have interview next week.

-  Sold rings I never wear anymore so I have gas and cigarette money

-  We get paid Saturday

-  We now have a kitchen full of food

-  John is awesome

-  Had some good ideas last night thanks to a friend of ours and the green gift he brought over - that and Sterolab on NPR yesterday afternoon and 17-year cicadas.

-  I freaking love my new phone (a Pantech Flex - never thought I would own a Pantech, but it’s really good quality and gets good reviews)

-  I am awesome

-  WE are awesome